How Counselling Can Help Parents Cope With Mental Health Struggles

How Counselling Can Help Parents Cope With Mental Health Struggles

What does counselling look like for new parents (and how can it help them to relieve the mental load)? Parenting is often described as a journey that takes parents through ups and downs, growth and confusion, and many other obstacles and triumphs. Although there are beautiful parts of parenthood for many parents, the challenging moments can be very challenging. In many cases, parents are at a higher risk of chronic stress, mental health conditions, and emotional pitfalls. For this reason, counselling exists as a helpful way for us as parents to find effective and compassionate support.

We’re joined by BetterHelp: the people who make it easier to take control of your mental health. Read on to find out more about the benefits of receiving counselling as a parent.

This blog is a part of a paid partnership with BetterHelp – our Brand Partner for May. As a BetterHelp affiliate, we receive compensation from BetterHelp if you purchase products or services through the links provided. This compensation will go towards helping more families connect with baby and toddler classes.

Common Mental Health Challenges For Parents

If you’ve noticed you’re not feeling as bright and happy as you might have once felt, you’re not alone. 48% of parents state their stress is overwhelming on a daily basis, compared to only 26% of other adults. Below are some of the common challenges you might be familiar with as a parent.

Anxiety And Depression

Anxiety and depression are the most common mental illnesses in the UK, but they are also highly common in parents. In the UK, 68% of women and 57% of men with mental illnesses are parents. Symptoms of these conditions can include, but are not limited to:

  • Changes in appetite
  • Changes in sleep patterns
  • Physical symptoms, such as headaches, stomach pains, and sweating
  • Difficulty finding motivation for self-care and daily tasks
  • A sense of impending doom
  • Anxiety or panic attacks
  • Frequent worrying
  • Racing thoughts
  • Restlessness and difficulty relaxing
  • Fatigue and exhaustion
  • Confusion and memory loss (in severe cases of stress)
  • A prolonged sadness, apathy, or melancholy state
  • Irritability

These symptoms can make caring for children and yourself difficult. Some parents may have the sense that they are only able to attend to their children’s needs and not their own.

Parenting Stress

Parenting can be stressful, and you may have noticed that each stage of raising a child can involve its own challenges. For example, our kids may start to ask lots of questions around the toddler years (there’s a reason people refer to it as the “terrible twos!”). When stress continues to mount and isn’t addressed, it can lead to a risk of physical illness, anxiety, and depression. Although some amount of stress can be normal, try to remind yourself that stress can be addressed, and counselling is one way to find support. You don’t have to have a mental illness or diagnosis to go to therapy. 

Relationship Challenges

Having kids can change the dynamics of one’s relationships, including new connections. You might not have the same amount of time you used to have, or you and your partner might start to argue as stress rises in the household. When you don’t have an outlet to communicate about these challenges, the stress might cause a breakup, divorce, or frequent arguments, which can be unhealthy for you and your children. Studies show that a child’s environment is most frequently the cause of behavioural issues.

How Counselling Can Be A Useful Resource For You As Parents

Counselling can be a helpful way for parents to cope with stress, mental health challenges, or emotional dysregulation. In counselling, your counsellor can teach you coping mechanisms that help you through parenting milestones. Research has found that parents going to therapy may actually help children with their anxiety, which can, in turn, support the parents’ anxiety symptoms. In counselling, you may learn the following skills:

  • Conflict resolution for families
  • Emotional regulation
  • How to talk to your children about difficult topics
  • How to set boundaries
  • Setting and enforcing rules
  • Coping with changes in a child’s identity
  • Helping children through relationships
  • Unique challenges like teen pregnancy or family trauma
  • How to cope with a traumatic event like divorce or loss as a family
  • How to work through stress on a daily basis
  • Mindfulness techniques
  • Ways to help your kids learn about mental health
  • Ways to connect your physical and mental health

What Is Counselling Like?

If you’ve never been to counselling before, you might not know what to expect. Counselling generally involves a client and a therapist, though some therapists support couples or families, as well. In your first session, your counsellor may ask you about your goals for therapy, your recent symptoms, and what you are most concerned about. If you’ve done therapy before, they may ask you what has worked for you in the past. Together, you can draft a treatment plan unique to your situation.

Mental Health Support Options

If you’re seeking counselling in the UK as parents, you have many options available. However, barriers can come up to finding in-person support, so even if you don’t have a therapist in your area, you might try options like BetterHelp, which allow you to get matched with a counsellor online.

Online therapy platforms are cost-effective ways for parents like you to get support. In addition, studies back up these platforms. In one study, internet-based therapy increased parents’ ability to emotionally regulate, which improved stress within their families. Parents also found the intervention more convenient for their family needs.

Takeaway 

Parenting is a unique journey that many of us face in life. You’re not a “bad parent” if you start to struggle with any milestones or challenges during parenthood. Millions of people face challenges like postpartum depression, anxiety, stress, and conflict within their families. For support, consider seeking a counsellor online or in your area to build a plan to restructure your life in a way that works for you.

Thanks To BetterHelp

Starting therapy can feel overwhelming, but BetterHelp makes it easy. Whether you’re navigating a tough time, working on personal growth, or just need extra support, you can fill out a brief questionnaire and get matched with a credentialed therapist in as little as 48 hours. With a network of over 5,000 credentialed therapists, we help you find someone who fits your unique needs, preferences, and goals. If your first match isn’t the right fit, switching is simple, so you can connect with the right support without the stress.

No referrals, no waiting room—just flexible, professional counselling from the comfort of your home. Live sessions are available via video, phone, or live chat, and you can message your counsellor anytime. Now you can focus on what matters most: getting the help you deserve.

Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?

Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!

Find a class today!

If You Found This Post Useful, You May Also Like:

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What Is ‘Pregnancy Brain’? (And Is It Really A Thing?)

What Is ‘Pregnancy Brain’? (And Is It Really A Thing?)

“It felt like my brain didn’t work, I couldn’t think straight. Every thought I had I was arguing with myself.”

Having a baby and experiencing what you think must be baby brain? Perhaps you’re forgetting things or feeling easily distracted, when you’re usually extra-organised and alert. So what is pregnancy brain exactly and is it really a thing?

What Are Team Happity’s Thoughts On Pregnancy Brain?

“Definitely a thing for me! I really lacked my usual energy and motivation during pregnancy, which was (in turn) a massive knock to my confidence, since I identified quite strongly at that time with being a ‘get it done’ type of person. 

“Making decisions was also harder, I found, like a brain fog type of feeling. It felt like my brain didn’t work, I couldn’t think straight. Every thought I had I was arguing with myself.

“I also had very strong nesting instincts right from the beginning. I was the first amongst my friends to get pregnant and they still expected me to turn up for dinners and birthdays even when it was the last thing I felt like doing.”

Lisa, Team Happity

“My brain felt fuzzy and I just felt really bored and not interested in things – even though there was loads to do. Snacking on cheesy crisps seemed to help, and bizarrely this was the thing I most looked forward to each morning! I also had to give myself permission to rest, sleep and nap. A friend once said, ‘you’re literally growing another person inside you’ and it’s totally true! Be kind to yourself.”

Liz, Team Happity

“I agree it’s a thing!

“Here’s a story: when heavily pregnant with Alice and needing a snack, I went into the kitchen looking for an apple. I then sat back in the living room, got settled and then couldn’t remember if I got the apple or not. I couldn’t see it and couldn’t get up so I accepted the fact that I did not have the apple… until I managed to get up later and found it was under my bump and I couldn’t see it!”

Helen, Team Happity

“My baby brain never left! I also agree it’s a thing, but genuinely feel I haven’t recovered.”

Sheefa, Team Happity

So Is Pregnancy Brain Really A Thing?

Neuroscientists have proved there is a significant alteration in the amount of white-matter integrity during the first two trimesters. This means that the connections between different areas of the brain are strengthened, which could help explain the nesting instinct.

In the study they conducted, neuroscientists also found a decrease in grey matter of about 4% in almost 80% of the brain. Grey matter is linked to memory, emotions and movement, so this also supports the ‘baby brain theory’ where mums-to-be can feel more forgetful, clumsy and emotional. Some of the changes they mapped were still visible two years postpartum!

Dr. Saleh, a maternal-fetal medicine specialist, talks about the environment around the brain cells altering as changing hormones move around the body. He says this affects neurons, helping to explain why so many women feel distracted, can’t concentrate and have memory problems.

Lack of sleep, stress and overall tiredness, which most pregnant women experience, can also contribute to these feelings anyway!

Check out this video from the Bump, which explains more about what you might be feeling and experiencing during week 26 of your pregnancy, when many pregnant women experience pregnancy brain. 

 What Can I Do To Help With Brain Fog During Pregnancy?

pregnancy brain - the image shows a pregnant lady sitting on a gym ball and raising her hands in the air
  • Stock Up On Sleep

Firstly, try to get enough sleep – and take naps during the day if at all possible. We all know how our memory and concentration can suffer if we’re sleep-deprived even when we’re not pregnant. So give your brain the best chance of remembering things by getting in some zzzs.

  • Practise Self-Care (Avoid Extra Stress)

It’s easier said than done but try and schedule in some regular time to look after yourself. Remember it’s OK to say ‘no’ to extra commitments – after all, you do have a whole other human growing inside you.

  • Eat Nutritious Meals And Snacks

Hopefully you’re over the worst of the morning sickness phase (though some women do experience nausea throughout their pregnancy) and have some appetite. Try to eat small, nutritious regular meals and stock up on high-energy, nutritious snacks like nuts, bananas, figs, prunes, porridge etc. The NHS recommends checking the green, amber, red labels on food to help you make healthier choices easily. 

pregnancy brain - the photograph shows three pregnant women sitting in a row on yoga mats in a yoga pose
  • Exercise

Exercise can help boost cognitive function and memory, as well as helping you switch off better at the end of each day. So why go for a gentle walk or book in for some pregnancy yoga classes right now?

  • Take Photo Reminders

Dr. Saleh, a maternal-fetal medicine specialist, recommends taking snapshots on your phone camera of important things so you don’t forget them. This could be where you left your keys or important documents, as well as where you parked your car. This could be one for non-pregnant mums as well, we reckon!

  • Puzzle It Out

Dr. Saleh also recommends keeping your brain active by completing crossword or Sudoku puzzles. This should help boost your brain and your memory. 

pregnancy brain - the photograph shows a calendar with 'Earth Day' written in one of the spaces and a drawing of the world
  • Use A Calendar Or Notes App That Works For You

Whether it’s a physical calendar, a Google calendar on your phone, or a notes app, use whatever works for you to set reminders, add important dates and take notes. Another top tip we’ve heard is using the WhatsApp audio or video record function. You don’t have to send this to anyone – you can just record it as a message for yourself! Another one existing mums could adopt as well, we think. 

  • Build A Support Network

Accept offers of help from friends and family. If your partner or a family member/friend can take on some of the mental load, so you have less to think about and remember, that’s also great. 

pregnancy brain - the photograph shows a pregnant woman in a forest with her arms in the air, looking happy to be in nature

Disclaimer: although we have researched this article using up-to-date sources, we aren’t medical experts. Some degree of ‘pregnancy brain’ and mild forgetfulness is common for many people. However, if you feel you are suffering severe symptoms, feel depressed or are concerned in any way about your, a partner, or friend’s mental health, please always consult your GP or a medical professional.  We also have resources on the Happity website about mental wellness.

Want to get out and about, have fun with your baby or toddler, and meet other parents?

Search Happity to find everything that’s happening for the under-5s in your local area – from music and singing classes, to messy play, arts and crafts, baby massage, gymnastics and more. Simply enter your postcode and child’s age to search, and then book your spot in a few taps. Enjoy dedicated fun time with your little one, watch their skills develop, and make friends at the same time. Mums, dads, grandparents and carers will all find something to love!

Find a class today!

If You Found This Post Useful, You May Also Like:

Fact Or Fiction? Let’s Debunk Common Pregnancy Misconceptions

An Early Years Expert’s Advice To De-stress As A Parent

The Maternal Mental Load: How To Reduce It And Avoid Burnout